FAQ: Transition Basics

Welcome to the first of our FAQs series of posts. We’ll be covering various topics in these, trying to give you the most information about a particular subject as we can. You can always find all of the FAQs by looking in the FAQs category.

Anyways, today I’ll be talking about the basic steps of transition for both transgirls and transguys. I should note that this is how it is done in the USA, and other countries may differ from this in some ways. This is a process that will consume a lot of time and money. It can cost you heavily both emotionally and physically. But if you truly are transsexual, it might be the only way out for you, the only way to safely move on in your life. So let’s go on a journey, and check out what you will most likely encounter.

The Beginning

So you’ve realized that you are transsexual, eh? Well, that’s certainly a good start, it gives you a path to follow and all, but what do you do with that realization? Well, the first thing you will want to do is find an understanding therapist. Before you can actually begin hormone replacement therapy (HRT), you will need to have been seeing a therapist for a number of months.

I am pretty sure the requirement in the USA is for transgirls to have at least three months of therapy, and transguys six months. The reason for this is that testosterone produces permanent results faster than estrogen/progesterone. They want to make sure transguys are really sure they want to go through with this. The same applies to transgirls, but it takes longer for the female hormones to start showing permanent changes, which is why they can start earlier.

Your therapist might make you wait longer, depending on what they think about your situation. For instance, my therapist would write me the letter to get hormones, would have a while back, but because I currently lack a job, she doesn’t want to do so. She wants to make sure I can afford to pay for them before she will OK them.

Hormone Replacement Therapy

So you’ve been seeing your therapist for awhile now, and s/he finally has written you a letter approving you to start HRT. What’s next? Well, you will need to find yourself a qualified endocrinologist. This is one of those things where quality trumps price. Hormones, if done wrong, can kill you, so you want to make sure you are seeing someone who has plenty of experience. It is best to find one who has experience with transsexual patients, if you can. Not everyone will be able to of course, but if you can’t, then just find the best endocrinologist you can find. This is also why you don’t want to self medicate with hormones, because it is something that needs to be carefully administered and monitored by a professional.

If you are a transguy, odds are the only thing you will be put on is testosterone, which is a potent male hormone. This will be given to you through injections. You can either self-inject or go to a doctor to do it for you. Transgirls are a little more complex when it comes to HRT. For sure you will be on estrogen, which can be given to you in a variety of ways. Injections and pills are the two most common ways. You may also be put on a progestin/progesterone. And finally, depending on what hormones you are already taking, you may be put on an androgen blocker, to help block the effects of testosterone.

I should add that after you remove your primary hormone producing organs (testicles or ovaries), you will need to be on hormones for the rest of your life. Your body will not produce enough hormones on its own to keep you nice and healthy. Of course, after a few years on the hormones, you will be dropped down to lower dosages, so it will get a little cheaper for you.

Voice

Now, for transguys, this is a very simple task. They sit back and relax, and let the male hormones kick their voice into guy mode. The vocal cords will thicken up and they’ll probably have the joy of a cracking voice for a bit of time.

Transgirls have a bit more complicated set of steps to do. Female hormones will do nothing for your voice, so you have to train yourself to have a feminine voice. This process will take time, probably at least a year. You will have to train yourself hard, and this might end up being the hardest part for you to do. If you have had any type of voice training, be it singing or other things, you will probably have an easier time doing this.

Now, there is a type of benefit from this, at least for some people. You will now have access to both a female and male voice. This would be great for a voice actress, being able to do both genders with ease. For most people though, you will probably eventually forget about your old male voice, leaving it to wither inside you.

Electrolysis (transgirls)

This is the first surgical procedure that transgirls will get to help them pass. This is the only procedure the FDA has approved as being capable of permanently removing body hair. Some people can just get away with laser removal, while others do laser and clean up the remainder through electrolysis. Facial hair will not be affected by the female hormones, other than to possibly slow down the growth rate. So electrolysis will help remove that hair from your face, which will greatly aid in passing as female.

Depending on how much body hair, particularly on the chest and back, that you now have after the female hormones, you may need some electrolysis there as well. While I am at it, you might also need to have your pubic hair cleaned up to a degree. The biggest part would be the hair on your scrotum, which is good to remove before you get the genital surgery. The reason is the scrotal tissue will become the labia, and you don’t really want hair growing all over the place there. If you don’t do it, the surgeon will probably scrape the hair follicles out when s/he is working down there, but it would make things easier on the surgeon if you took care of it beforehand.

Chest Reconstruction Surgery (transguys)

This is the first surgical procedure that transguys will get to help them pass. Now, as a transgirl, I only know a little bit about this, mainly from my friend Roger. Basically what happens is they go in and remove enough breast tissue and skin to flatten out the chest. According to my sister, they will cut the areola and reshape it, making it appear more masculine. Finally, they will move the areola and nipples into a new, more masculine position.

Real Life Test

You’ve been taking your hormones for awhile now, your voice is passable, your look is passable. Everyone around you sees you as the proper gender now. So what’s next? Well, you will begin your Real Life Test (RLT), which is where you live in your desired sex 24/7, usually for about a year or so. You will present as your internal gender all the time, to anyone and everyone. You will have to accomplish this before you will be allowed to get your final surgery.

Name / Gender Change

Before you start your RLT, you will probably want to get your name legally changed. Generally this is a simple and cheap process. The process and costs will probably differ depending on where you live, but it should be pretty easy to find out.

The gender change is a little more complicated. Some states are really a pain about it, while others are more understanding. In some places, you might need to go all the way through with the final surgery. In others, you just need to prove that you either plan on doing the surgery, or that you plan on living in your target gender forever. This is more complex than a name change, and therefore will probably cost you more as well.

It would possibly be a good idea to get a lawyer to help you out with it, to make sure things go as smoothly as can be. Some states actually might require you to go to court to explain why you are doing it, while others might be pretty simple. Of course, a lawyer familiar with gender changes could be of some good use to you, if you have the money to spare for one. Otherwise, just make sure to do some heavy research about the requirements in your state or country.

Final Surgery

Here it is, the final surgery. You’ve spent years jumping through hoops, spending thousands of dollars, but you have finally made it here. Most transgirls will likely get the genital surgery, which uses the penis and scrotum as raw material to make the vagina. Doctors have been getting more skilled at this type of surgery, and can pull off some amazing results.

Transguys on the other hand just might choose to wait. They will probably go and have their internal sex organs removed, but still leave the vagina intact. The reason for this is that the two available types of surgery to create a penis are… lacking. One method gives a penis that can get erect and have all kinds of sensation, but is basically miniature in form. The other gives a more naturally sized penis, but it can’t get an erection and from what Roger says looks kind of weird as well. He calls it the Zombie Penis. In addition, the costs may be prohibitive for a transguy, as the surgery costs far more than a transgirls does. Until the surgery gets perfected some more, a lot of transguys just might decide to hold off on that goal.

Congrats / Costs

Congrats! You’ve made it to the end of your goals, and are hopefully integrated nicely into your chosen gender role. So what did all this run you? Well, it cost a lot, that is for sure. Emotionally, physically, and financially. The emotional costs can’t be calculated, as they can vary wildly from one person to the next. The physical costs are also hard to pin down. What can be easily figured is both the financial costs and the time spent working towards it.

I’ll give a breakdown for transgirls and transguys, with an estimated total as well. Of course, this number can vary quite a bit as well, but it will give you a rough idea. The time spent will be roughly the same for each gender. For a lot of people, you are probably looking at three to four years, at least.

	Transgirls	Transguys
Clothing / Makeup	$500 — $1,500	$500
Doctors	$10,000+	$10,000+
Hormones	$5,000 — $7,000	$5,000 — $7,000
Electrolysis	$10,000 — $20,000+
Chest Reconstruction		$5,000 — $10,000
Lawyers	$5,000	$5,000
Genital Surgery	$10,000 — $20,000	$30,000 — $100,000
Final estimated costs over four years	$40,500 — $63,500	$55,500 — $132,500

James Bra: First Mission

Photo credit: aschaeffer

Your daughter asking you to go bra shopping is a pretty typical experience. What makes this request so different is my daughter was born a son. Winterspark, who is almost 21, recently asked me to go shopping with her to purchase a bra.

For a typical teenage girl, this isn’t so difficult; but since Winterspark still passes as a boy, this requires a lot more planning on both of our parts.

Winter knew she needed a store that doesn’t monitor the dressing rooms. So that eliminates Target, Wal-Mart etc. We decided a store at the mall would be better, but needed one where the men’s and women’s are on the same floor. We settled on Sears.

We carefully discussed how to allow Winter to shop for a bra while keeping her safe in the process. It was decided that she needed another female with her, so I agreed when she asked me. I suggested that Winter pick up a pair of jeans in the men’s department to act as camouflage for carrying the bras into the dressing room. I would pick out the bras and carry them until we had all the ones she wanted to try on.

Luckily, the store wasn’t all that crowded for a Sunday. I was able to quietly discuss which ones she wanted and then discreetly hand them to her. Winter then casually shifted them under the pants and we proceeded to the men’s dressing room. I stayed outside keeping my eyes and ears opened for any problems. Fortunately, we live in Albuquerque, a very open, liberal, and tolerant area. It would take a lot to draw attention to oneself here.

After trying them on and selecting the one she wanted, she hid it back under the jeans and we returned to the bra area to pick out one more in the same style, but in black. I carried them to the cashier and we paid for them.

While buying a bra for a transgirl who still looks like a boy takes more planning, support, and a little forethought, the experience was very rewarding for both of us.

Tips for bra shopping as a transgirl:

1. Take a female friend or relative that you can trust.
2. Shop at a store that has unmonitored dressing rooms.
3. Shop at a store where both men’s and women’s departments are on the same floor.
4. Pick up a larger item of clothing for cover.
5. Relax and have fun, but stay safe!

R.I.P. Angie Zapata — Ignorance about the Transgendered

Rest in Peace, Angie Zapata

Ignorance breeds fear. Fear breeds hate. Hate breeds violence.

I’ve been following a pretty sad story these last few days. You can read about it from the Associated Press, ABC News, the New York Times, the Greeley Tribune, and plenty of other websites.

Angie Zapata, an 18 year old transsexual girl, was found beaten to death in her apartment July 17, 2008. Her sister was the one who discovered the body. Angie’s car was also stolen. It turns out that a man by the name of Allen Ray Andrade was the one who killed and robbed her. This guy had met her online, through a social networking website, and they decided to meet in real life.

You can read the details of the murder and their meeting in the various news articles and blog posts about it, listed as links throughout this entry. What I can’t believe is that not only did he kill her just because of how she was born, but that he also refused to give her any kind of dignity. He would refer to her as an “it,” like she was some kind of object. It appears that to him, when he thought she was a ciswoman she was fine and worthy of respect, but when he found out she was a transwoman, she was suddenly dropped in status to that of an object, to get rid of when you are done with it, just throw it away.

Some people are worried they might try and go with a “trans-panic” defense, which tries and puts the blame on the victim instead of the criminal. Like it is the victim’s fault that the criminal killed them, just because of how they were born. Sadly, there are people who would support such a claim. Would you support this claim? If so, how about a “race-panic” defense? A “religion-panic” defense? A “gender-panic” defense? Would you support those as well? In the past, you might have actually said yes, but the average person nowadays would just look at you in shock, wondering how you could possibly even think something like that. You mention “trans-panic” or “gay-panic” though, and suddenly you will have a lot of people start thinking about it, like it could be a valid reason to commit a crime.

This is a pretty sad story, more so because it was obviously brought about by fear, ignorance, and hate. I bring this story up, because it illustrates quite clearly one of the fears that transgendered, and especially transsexual, people have to deal with. Any person, no matter how nice looking or seeming, could be a threat if they knew that you were transsexual. You can’t live your life in fear, of course, but you have to be more cautious than the average person does.

Most of the people replying to the news articles out there are sympathetic, and that is wonderful. But there is the occasional person who shows no sympathy. It is just like the ignorant hatred of the past, be it about race, gender, sexual orientation, or any other difference someone could come up with. I’ll quote the person for you, to give a good picture as to why we fear people knowing that we are transgendered.

Ugggh! The freak of nature deserved it. Letting on that “she” was “all woman”. Makes your stomach turn and your skin crawl to know that these things are out and about. Yes, they are “things”. Love the way these crybabies try to make this special by calling it a hate crime. Its a crime, period. Most crimes of violence are the result of hate, einsteins. And all you quasi-intellectuals: Stop the preaching and presuming to instruct everyone on the whys and wherefores on subjects like this. We’re not impressed and we don’t care.

These are the type of people we fear, the type of reactions we worry about most. These are the type of people we would expect to kill us, just because of how we were born. It it still a very dangerous world to be transsexual, or even just gender variant. Men seem to be the biggest threat in general, but women have done things just as bad before… it just doesn’t seem to occur as often.

I can give some good examples from experience, although I am also a little more paranoid than I probably need to be. Of course, it is better paranoid than dead. For instance, I walk regularly at this one park, looping it for exercise, usually making one or two miles before I quit. The first few times after I found a nice feminine hairstyle, especially the first time, I was sort of nervous going there. I was afraid that I still looked enough like a guy, that someone might harass me or worse because of my hair. Same thing with wearing a bra, I was worried some people might notice it and do something to me.

When I went to my therapist last time, I went in my skirt, and there were four guys standing around the entrance to the building. Luckily my grandpa was there, which made me feel more secure, but I was still nervous of them, because I can generally only pass at a distance or glance.

And this is the problem. Right now, most of society is even ignorant of our existence. The people who are aware of us, usually misunderstand us. There are few people out there who actually not only understand, but can sympathize as well. And until more people truly understand our unique situation, there will still be fear for us. Right now, in a lot of areas, it would be literal suicide to announce that you are transgendered. In the future that may change, which would be wonderful, but until then we have to be very careful out there.

Angie Zapata, 18 year old girl, murdered

I’d like to ask you to keep this entry in mind, keep Angie’s murder in mind, the next time you encounter someone who is different from you. It doesn’t matter how they are different, just that if you would treat them differently because of that, then remember this entry. Try and treat them like you would anyone else, because not only are they a normal human being like you, but you or a family member may one day be like them, or know someone who is like them, and that person might get hurt. Make sure you aren’t one of those people that will cause the hurt.

Rest in Peace Angie Zapata, and may your family find peace as well.

Safe2Pee

For most people, going to the bathroom is a completely brain-dead task. No real thought has to go into which bathroom you use, and what problems you might find inside. For transgendered people though, a simple thing like going to the bathroom can become a nerve wracking experience. Which bathroom do you use? What problems might you encounter? These and other questions can enter into a transperson’s mind when trying to pick a bathroom to use. I’ve had these same thoughts myself, although only on a limited basis since I don’t pass too well right now.

In most places, you have male bathrooms and female bathrooms. Some have genderless bathrooms or family bathrooms. These are the easiest for a transperson, because no one will question them going into it, and no one will harass them for using it. I have heard that in some other countries, they have genderless bathrooms everywhere. Men and women use the same bathrooms together. People who aren’t used to bathrooms like that are afraid that they’ll be harassed or attacked in that situation, but obviously that hasn’t occurred any more often than in gender segregated bathrooms, or else they wouldn’t last. One of these days, America may have plenty of genderless bathrooms around, but for now that isn’t that case.

If you are a transgirl, you have to worry about being harassed or attacked in the men’s bathroom. This becomes more true the closer you get to looking and sounding female. The same would be true for transguys using the women’s bathroom. In fact, my friend Roger can’t even use the women’s bathroom anymore, because he looks too masculine. It’s awesome for him to be able to now use the proper restroom, although kind of ironic as well, since he has yet to begin HRT.

Female, Questioning, and Male bathroom signs.

I ran across a website a year or more ago, called Safe2Pee. It is a mashup with Google Maps, that allows people to submit bathrooms, with information about them, to the website and have them show up as markers on the embedded Google Maps. You can see if they are gendered or genderless, if you need to pay or can walk in and use them, and find directions to the bathroom as well. Currently they have nearly 1,600 bathrooms listed in 414 cities and three countries. They have also opened up a beta for Europe, which can be accessed at the top of the page.

While it misses plenty of bathrooms, as all the listings are user submitted, it can be a great resource, especially in large cities like San Francisco, CA or Las Vegas, NV. Our very own Albuquerque, NM has only a paltry eight bathrooms listed, which is something I wouldn’t mind helping out with once I get the time. Of course, if you find it lacking, you can always fill in the blanks for your city. While this will probably not be of much use to our cisgendered family and friends, it can be of great use for the transgendered.

Welcome to our blog!

I’m Winterspark, and I’m a bisexual transgirl. This blog will talk about various aspects of my transition and the effect it has on me and those around me. There will be various contributors to this blog, including my mom and possibly my two sisters as well. I’ve been in transition since July or so of 2007, although most of the transition work has been on the mental side of things, rather than the physical. I have yet to do anything to massively affect my body, like hormone replacement therapy, but I have been working with a therapist for quite a while now.

This blog will be done anonymously, to protect the identities of those involved. There is still a lot of discrimination against both transgendered people and their families, which is why we are keeping things anonymous here. My hope is that this blog will help other transpeople like myself and their families. It would also be nice if this blog helped people not involved with the transgendered learn more as well.

I’ll be talking about the various things the happen with me as I transition, along with what will be happening in the future. I also plan on writing some articles to help out the transgendered and friends of the transgendered, covering different topics and such.

Anyways, I’ll make sure to get something other than a welcome post up soon, but for now welcome to the blog and I hope you enjoy your stay!